A desperate woman took to Reddit to share a shaky conflict she had been through with her family.
“AITA” or “Am I the A ** hole”, subreddit is an online community where people can come and anonymously share their frustrations with strangers and get strangers’ thoughts about the conflict.
Subreddit users then vote on who “the a ** hole” is, if any.
The wife worries if she overreacts after her husband threw out her sister and little nephew.
The woman says her 20-year-old sister had just come out of a bad relationship, so she and her husband both voluntarily opened their home to her.
She explains that after the breakup, her younger sister was left with a 5 month old son as well as mental issues like PPD and depression.
The woman makes it very clear that her husband was at first keen to let his sister stay with them when she asked, and he even picked her up and brought her to their house.
Shortly after his sister moved in, the man began to see this as a problem.
The woman’s sister had only been living there for two weeks when her husband began complaining about the new life situation, especially frustrated by their nephew’s crying, which the man said “gave him stress”.
Understanding that babies are likely to cry, the woman did not really have much consolation for the complainants, but she “suggested he put on some headphones” to block out the noise.
Suddenly he dropped the problem and the woman stopped worrying for a while.
A week ago, she wrote, she took out of town for a friend’s funeral while her husband stayed with her sister “to make sure she was okay”.
When she got home, her sister was gone.
She says her husband claimed she decided to stay with a friend, pack up and leave the same morning.
He even gave her a letter, claiming it was from her sister, but when she discovered all this strange information, the woman wrote, “It was so strange … especially after reading the letter.”
It was clearly not a particularly convincing letter as she had tried to call her sister several times until her husband ‘found’ her phone which she had apparently ‘forgotten’.
Even her other relatives knew nothing about her sister’s whereabouts.
When she found out the truth, the woman became furious.
The day before her story was published, the woman was called on an unknown number and it was her sister.
It was during this conversation that the woman realized that she had been lied to: her sister had not gone alone but had been thrown out by her husband and told her that she should “take responsibility for their own decisions”.
In her message, she explains: “I was in shock when she explained to me that she was not with a friend, but at a shelter, and that she had no money”.
She exploded on her husband when he got home, furious that he was doing this to his sister and lied to her about it.
During this time, she explains, “he said I was unfair and that I was wrong in blaming him that he wanted peace in his house”.
But she could not understand how he justified his side as he continued to accuse her of prioritizing his sister over him, she felt he was entitled to at least protect their little nephew.
She did not want to leave them in the shelter, so she told him she would pick them up tomorrow, but he threatened to change the locks on their house while he was away, saying his sister must not return.
Now she is lost in the situation and ends with an update that she should stay at the hotel for the night and try to meet her sister and discuss a plan as soon as possible.
The verdict was: not the asshole.
Not surprisingly with this story, most Reddit users were much more shaken by her husband’s actions than by the author’s.
Not only did they think the man was the “hole” in this situation, but many feared that he was far more dangerous than the wife could even imagine.
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The top commenter warns the author of the post as such, saying: “He is a dangerous man. He threw a woman and her newborn baby on the street without worrying about the fucking world. Now he is threatening to exclude you from your own home. You must separate from him. Immediately. “
It was a common thread in the top comments: Many thought more about the woman than she had probably expected.
While she mostly tried to figure out where he was coming from and whether she had overreacted, many commentators pointed out that this behavior from her husband should not be acceptable no matter where he is coming from.
One commenter pointed out how untrustworthy he was to do so, saying, ‘He went BEHIND YOUR RUG to do this to your beloved. HE MADE A LETTER. He kept his phone for you. It’s completely out of proportion to everything that’s happened. It was unjustified cruelty and a breach of trust. Gtfo of this relationship. He will definitely repeat this behavior.
So it seems that the affected user in this case may be dealing with something worse than a hole **, but we can only hope that the woman will follow some of the advice given and protect herself.
Amanda Hartmann is a writer and editorial intern at YourTango, who writes about news and entertainment.
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