The term “narcissist” has come up with increasing frequency in recent years, and although many people have only limited knowledge about it, it is still used in a negative context. In fact, many of us have narcissistic traits, and they are even healthy. After all, it is important to prioritize and love oneself.
In fact, a full-blooded narcissist – to call it that – is not something you meet often. According to several studies, narcissistic personality disorder affects only 1% of people. Although this percentage according to other international surveys is increasing.
For a passionate and loving relationship does not mean you can not live your own life anymore.
Also read: “10 tips to escape the routine in your relationship”
The most important characteristics of a narcissist
Before knowing if a relationship with a narcissist can work, it is important to know how to recognize a person with narcissistic personality disorder. According to psychologist Elisabeth Shaw, a person may have a narcissistic personality disorder if five of the following criteria apply to that person:
- The person is very full of himself and extremely preoccupied with his own life;
- Needs constant and disproportionate admiration;
- Expect others to see them as superior because of their (often unimportant) achievements and talents;
- The person is selfish and cannot recognize the feelings of others;
- The person has fantasies about his or her own boundless success, power, and ingenious plans;
- This person thinks they are special and only wants to be with other “special” people. She despises people who are inferior in her eyes;
- Feels that nothing can be denied her and expects people to follow her;
- Often exploits others to get what she wants;
- Often feels jealous of others or is convinced that others are jealous of her.
Also read: “Toxic personality: what if it was me? »
A romantic relationship with a narcissist
Is it possible to have a romantic relationship with a narcissistic person? Yes quite. Is it possible to have a happy relationship with this person? Not really. How can you be happy with someone who always does everything about him? However, it is possible to have a happy relationship with someone who exhibits narcissistic tendencies. However, it is important remember the following:
- Make sure you can distinguish real actions from false actions. For example, does your partner care about you because they really want to take care of you, or is it a way to get something?
- Do not think you can change anyone. It is almost impossible for people with many narcissistic traits to develop other ideas. So they have a hard time seeing that their behavior can make you unhappy. So ask yourself if that really is what you want.
- People with narcissistic traits always want to look perfect. The relationship they are in must therefore also be perfect. They will expect you to do your best to preserve this image.
Relationships with people with narcissistic tendencies are successful when the person has a good self-image. Keep in mind that over time, This type of relationship can also damage your self-esteem and that you may need your friends and family to maintain your self-esteem. Also, even if your partner has a hard time feeling empathy, it is important that they are able to respond well to your feelings and how you are feeling about the relationship.
This article first appeared on marieclaire.nl
If the topic interests you, also read: “How to cultivate self-confidence?”, “Harmful friendship: how to see it and get rid of it?” Or “What are the keys to putting an end to the mental burden?”